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The Day I Asked Vanna White Something Every Man in America Wanted!

Paul Marran

Updated: Jan 27




This afternoon, I was flipping channels and landed on Wheel of Fortune. I hadn’t watched it in years, but remembered the time when it was all the rage—like water cooler fodder the next day at work. Even The Ubba, a local hangout near me, gave you a free pint of Old Style if you guessed the phrase before the TV contestant did—that’s so Chicago.

 

It reminded me of a mid-summer morning late last century.  

 

The 4th floor of the Prudential Building at Leo Burnett Advertising was all abuzz because Vanna White was in town. That’s right. THE Vanna White. The letter-turning hostess of Wheel of Fortune and recently named ‘Sexiest Woman on the Planet’ would be signing her new autobiography at noon at Kroch’s and Brentano’s.

 

I just had to meet her because I knew she’d dig me. And she kinda did.

 

At about 11:45, I beelined it for the now-defunct bookstore. As I hurried through the revolving doors, I immediately spotted Vanna in all her letter-turning glory. Our eyes would have met, but the media and several beefy bodyguards blocked our destiny.

 

I ducked under the security rope and was immediately told I had to buy her book if I wanted her to sign it. Nearly $18 later, I found myself behind Lorraine from Lombard, who shared that she and her cats never missed a show.

 

The line moved quickly, and I wondered what to say to her. But like a 16-inch Clincher Softball down the middle, Vanna hit a home run and did all the talking for me.

 

When it was my turn and only a card table separating us, I handed her my book. She looked up at me, smiled, and said, “What would you like me to write?”

 

In my beautiful and nasally Chicago accent, I confidently stated, “Your phone number!”

 

She didn’t give it to me but was thoroughly entertained by my request and said, “That’s a first, you’re cute!”

 

Yay me! Oh, Vanna. What could have been?

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